Game & film icons · City to planet
Dante vs Deadpool
Two wisecracking mercenaries with swords, guns and healing factors, fighting over who gets the last slice of pizza.
Tale of the tape
| Devil May Cry | Universe | Marvel |
|---|---|---|
| City to planet | Tier | Superhuman |
| Rebellion, twin pistols, a dozen fighting styles and his demon form, the Devil Trigger | Strength | A healing factor that makes him nearly unkillable |
| Cannot take anything seriously, including fights to the death | Weakness | Will not stop talking |
| 3–0 | Record on Versus | 1–3–1 |
The Arena
Deadpool broke into a devil-hunting shop through the skylight, landed on the desk, and grabbed the last slice of pizza from the open box. Dante, feet up on the desk, did not even open his eyes. “Put it back,” he said. Deadpool turned to an invisible camera. “Okay, readers, he’s clearly the Japanese version of me. Look at the coat.”
Dante opened his eyes. “Who are you talking to?” Deadpool pointed at the reader. “Them! The audience!” Dante looked at the empty corner of the room, then back at Deadpool. “There’s nobody there.” Deadpool gasped. “That’s exactly what a video-game character would say!”
Dante sighed, kicked the desk out from under Deadpool, and caught the pizza slice before it hit the floor.
Round One
Deadpool drew his katanas. Dante drew Rebellion. They fought across the shop, smashing the jukebox, the pool table and three of Dante’s demon trophies. Dante was faster and much stronger. Deadpool was very, very annoying.
Dante cut Deadpool’s arm off. Deadpool picked it up and hit Dante with it. Dante shot Deadpool through the head. Deadpool’s head healed while he complained about how he was going to need a new mask. Dante laughed despite himself. Nobody had made him laugh in a fight in years.
“Okay,” Dante said, reloading. “You’re fun.” Deadpool bowed. “I get that a lot. Usually right before people shoot me.”
The Turn
Dante got serious, or as serious as Dante gets. He switched fighting styles in rapid succession: Trickster to dodge, Swordmaster for a flurry of blade attacks, Gunslinger to fill Deadpool with bullets, Royalguard to block his counter. Deadpool tried to keep up and could not even work out what was happening.
“Is this a combo system?” he yelled, as Dante juggled him in mid-air with sword strikes. “Are you doing a combo on me?! This is a video game thing! That’s cheating!” Dante grinned and kept him in the air for thirty more hits. A rank appeared in the air above them. Smokin’ Sick Style.
Deadpool landed in a heap on the floor, healing slowly. “Okay. That was kind of awesome.”
The Finish
Deadpool tried one last trick. He pulled out a grenade, smiled, and pulled the pin. Dante kicked it out of his hand, through the skylight, and it exploded harmlessly over the city. Then he pinned Deadpool to the wall with Rebellion through his shoulder.
Deadpool hung there, his feet dangling, and sighed. “Fine. Fine. You win. Can I have the pizza now?” Dante pulled the sword out, sat back down at his desk, and ate the last slice in one bite, very slowly, while maintaining eye contact.
Deadpool slid down the wall. “That,” he said to the reader, “was the cruellest thing anyone has ever done to me. And I’ve been cancelled twice.” Dante ordered two more pizzas. They ate them together, arguing about whose healing factor was better, until the sun came up.
The verdict
Dante wins
Deadpool’s healing factor means he cannot be killed easily, but Dante is stronger, faster, half demon, and switches between fighting styles that Deadpool can barely follow.
- Speed and strengthDante’s demonic heritage outclasses Deadpool physically.
- Style switchingFour fighting styles in ten seconds.
- DurabilityDante shrugs off everything Deadpool throws at him.
How the rematch could go differently: A Deadpool who used his knowledge of the fourth wall to read the next page of the story could finally get one step ahead.
Who do you think wins?
Who would win in a fight between Dante and Deadpool?
Dante wins. Deadpool’s healing factor means he cannot be killed easily, but Dante is stronger, faster, half demon, and switches between fighting styles that Deadpool can barely follow.